Sometimes my mother gives me the money and sometimes she doesn't. I don't always know when the money arrives. The cheque is in my mother's name. I am 28 years old and I want to have control over my own money. My boyfriend pays for his own phone, he does his laundry; he gets all of his money.

I want the cheque to come to me so that then I can control it – I can pay my mom for rent and stuff but then I make sure that I get some of the money.

Me and my boyfriend are planning on living on our own. But he's working so they will cut him off ODSP. If we live together, will I lose my ODSP?
Renee

I pay $200 for food and electricity and rent to my Dad. Then I give $200 to my mom. Plus $40 for cell phone. I give my parents $440. I worked part time for 3 months, but ODSP took some of the money back. I only get $750 a month. My cheque comes to me, it is deposited in my bank and then I have to pay my mom and dad. I like having control of my money this way.
Kaveh

I use my ODSP money to pay for some household expenses. It's enough since I live at my parents. But my cheque comes to me, too. This way I get to be in charge of it. I always pay my parents but I make sure I have money for my own things, too.
Sam

I have a hard time now paying bills. I get stressed out. It makes me want to do things and say things I shouldn't. It's just not enough money to get by. I live on my own in a lower rent apartment. I get $929.15 a month because I live by myself. If you live on your own you get more money than if you live with your family. A doctor had to sign a form for me and I had to take it to ODSP to get more money for a special diet. I was getting $164 for the special diet, now I only get $80 dollars. I had to go through some tests. I had to fast, drink the medicine, and sit for 2 hours. Now, I have to wait to see if I get more money for the special diet.
Donna

My Experience at Seneca College

Well here I am, 2 years ago filling out tons of paperwork to apply for College.  My parents had to help me.  I then got a letter from Seneca that said I have to do a 3 hour test plus an interview on my own with a Counsellor.  First I went for the test.  Was it ever long !  Some of it was easy and some I didn’t understand.  I just did my best and that’s all that counts.  My parents waited in the hall for over 3 hours!  Another day I had to go back for the interview and my parents were not allowed to come in.  When the interview was finished my parents came in the office and spoke with the Counsellor.  She said she was impressed with my manners and social skills.  She then asked if I want to go to College.  I said yes.  Then she said, Welcome, you’re going to get a letter from Seneca saying what I should do next.  I was so excited and happy but also a little scared.  Everyone was so happy when I got the letter. 

During the summer my Mom took me to the College a few times for me to get used to it.  We walked the halls and saw classrooms, washrooms, cafeteria, library and the Special Needs Department.  Everywhere we went was a long walk.  The halls go in different directions and it starts all over again on the 2nd floor. Mom told me to just relax and try to remember the best I can.  There are lots of Security Guards to help me if I get lost.  My Mom also reminded me there are lots of students just like me who will get lost at least once or twice so I won’t be alone.

On my first day of school I took the Mobility Bus.  I used this for my whole time at Seneca.  It really helped because it would take me a long time by bus.  The whole day was fun because we didn’t do any work.  We got tours of Seneca and the students got to know each other. That really helped.  The second day was serious because we began taking our classes.  The whole first Semester was class work with homework too.  I had Math, English, Computers, Social Skills, Gym and lots more.  Every night I had some home work.  That was the worst thing about College.  I couldn’t wait until first semester was over.

In second semester we had classes in Seneca plus we worked a couple days at a Work Placement.  We had to write down 5 places where we’d like to work.  My Professor went out and visited the places that her class wrote down and she got a placement for everyone.  My first was at Blockbuster Video. I had to work for 7 hours each day. It wasn’t to far from home.  About once a week my Professor would come in and visit me plus talk with the Boss.  Every night I had to write in a journal about what I did that day at work.  I did it as soon as I came home so I could it over with and just relax.

The third Semester was the same routine except I worked at a different place. This time I worked at Pet Friends.  It is a pet store with all kinds of animals, birds, fish and reptiles.  I really liked this placement because I got to play with the puppies in the morning while I cleaned their stalls.  I also helped with the birds and kept the shelves stocked plus I would sweep the floor when it needed to be done. I liked my job so much that it didn’t really feel like work. The boss was so nice.  She’d treat me sometimes to a coffee and a doughnut.  I could walk to work because it was so close to home.  That was nice.

At last I’m in the 4th semester and then I’m finished College.  By this time I knew where everything was in the College.  This one was different.  We had to work every day for 7 hours.  We only went to Seneca on a Tuesday.  I was more tired this time because of the long hours.  I worked at Chapters at Yonge and Steeles.  It was very quiet and relaxing but a little boring.  My job was to tidy the bookshelves but in minutes they were all messed up again from the customers.  That’s mostly what I did there.  I made a friend who worked in Starbucks at the front of Chapters.  Most times he’d treat me to a coffee. 

A funny and scary thing happened to me this semester.  While I was in the Gym at Seneca I stood talking to a friend and I accidentally put my hand on something to lean on.  All of a sudden I felt my finger being pressed down and I couldn’t get it out.  The next thing I knew I was lying down on the gym floor with an oxygen mask on and 2 or 3 Paramedics looking down at me.  My blood pressure was being checked and they asked me all kinds of questions like did you eat this morning.  I told them no because I’m not hungry first thing in the morning and sometimes I gag and throw up.  They gave me a glass of orange juice.  I heard the Paramedic tell the other one that he’s going to take some blood from me.  I’m afraid of needles and I fainted again !  By this time they knew it was my anxieties and nerves.  When I woke up they stayed with me until I could stand and feel normal.  The school called my Mom to let her know. My Mom said it’s up to Chris if he wants to stay or I will pick him up.  I wanted to stay.  I had a bandage around my finger.

All in all, I really liked College.  My favourite job was at the Pet Store.  I always got treats from the bosses because they said I was a hard worker.   The only bad thing was I didn’t get paid when I worked.  I liked working in the work force because there was no homework and I got to learn different things.  All of the employees liked having me because I was such a hard worker and sometimes did more than they wanted me to do.  I guess that is a good quality that I have and I am a people person too.  I learned if you work hard at what you do; it really pays off in the long run.  

I hope you enjoyed hearing about my experiences at Seneca College.

Chris De Pinto

Living on My Own

It's hard being independent and it's harder at the same time being you know "Special Ed".  I hate that word "Special". "Special" can mean something else. You know what I mean.

Having a job, mortgage, taxes, birthdays, I'm not really looking forward to. Cause I have to go shopping, say this is my grocery money, this is for birthdays and stuff. I'm walking in the stores and I see oh! "On Sale Now, a limited offer". There goes all my money. I hate it when that happens.

If you're working a cashier and you're not the brightest person, that could be tough. People go "Give me my money! Where's my change? This guy is a retard!" And then, after, you feel beat up, let down and whatever, and after people talk about you behind your back and say "Why did we hire this guy?"

When I move out I'd like to live with a mixture if possible, you know, people with learning disabilities and people who don’t have a disability. No, that would lead to problems. If it were me and some other dude came up to me and he was a p------ or something. You know how people without disabilities are always like - "You're stupid", and all that, blah blah blah. They might be bullies or whatever you want to say. Course it happens. It happens to everyone. "You're in a resource room. You're not the smartest or white." I feel pissed. I'm the type of person that bottles it up inside, remember. Until there's just too much pressure to handle and that little trigger goes off. It happened in my late days in elementary school. I used to get in fights. Cursing, yelling, emotions. It doesn't happen at school now. At home I swear, yell, don't give. I've been doing a lot of swearing. No violence! Oh, do you ever have that feeling when somebody touches your stuff? Ah!

I like to do art work, pottery and stuff.  I like seeing my creations come to life. Like you know when you're drawing, you start with a line, move on, move on and you finish. Wow. I hang it up. You're all proud of yourself.

On the first day of co-op, starting my first job ever, I didn't want to disappoint my boss, if you would say that. And then after he said "You're working too hard." I said "I don't want to disappoint you." He said "It's OK." H is like a character. He has a sense of humour, always funny, makes you feel not uncomfortable. Every time he saw me cleaning the window, he'd stop by to see how everything is going and I say whatever's on my mind. He keeps repeating, "If you have questions, ask. Don't be afraid to ask." I asked. And once in awhile we joke around, it's good. The first week he went step by step. I got the hang of it. Now it is like independent living only with co-op. You know it's like my sister said - she has a worker come to her house for a visit once a week in independent living. It's like that but co-op. I'm working as a janitor so there's 3-4 janitors. Once in awhile I see them go by, start to joke around, have a good sense of humour. I feel more comfortable. They're also supporting me, dropping by, visiting, humour, feel more comfortable. Like a team. So you're not working alone.

Emanuel

Why I Think it is Good to Belong to Groups

Hi. My name is Sam McKail and I want to talk about why I like to be a member of different groups. I started joining groups when I was leaving high school. I didn't have nothing to do after high school. I didn't have many people to hang out with, so my teacher told me about a group that was going on. It used to be called the "Youth Involvement Group" but then it changed its name to the "Out and About" group. It is part of Community Living in North York. I like this group. I have been part of this group for 8 years. We have get-togethers like movies, bowling, pot-luck dinners, and even art class. I like the social stuff, the social team we are when everyone gets together. We talk about our likes and dislikes, our special interests, and we catch up with each other. It is a good activity to meet other people and to have fun. Yeah.

I am also on the Self-Advocate's Executive Committee (we call it SAC) with Toronto Community Living on Spadina Ave. I am the secretary. I was elected for this. I take notes about our meetings, and planned events, and conferences, and guest speakers. Then I give them to the SAC coordinator and he types them up. I have been involved in the Self-Advocates group for 2 ½ years. People I know told me about it and I was interested and got involved. And then when I joined they told me about different positions I could run for in the election and so I decided to run for a position. I like going to conferences and staying in hotels for conferences, and having meetings with other self-advocates' groups. I like helping out with planning events. This group is fun. I like meeting people.

I am also in Ann Fudge Schormans' research group working with the pictures of people with disabilities. I wanted to join this research because I like to learn new things and I have never done research before. It is a good experience for me. I like doing research. Ann told us she needed help with her research and I like to help. I didn't have much to do in life so I decided to take a chance and try something new and participate.

I joined lots of groups. Another group I am part of is the Regional Board Fund-raising Committee for people with disabilities in North York. We talk about ways to raise money to help people with disabilities. I was also asked to join the Inclusive Schools Culture Task Force. This is also a Toronto Community Living group. We have meetings to talk about planning for school education to help students who have problems with their disabilities. We come up with ideas to help schools have a better way to help these kids. I meet a lot of people as part of this group. I am going to Thunder Bay soon for a meeting for this group. I really like this group. It is helpful for people.

I am on the Steering Committee Program with Toronto Community Living, too. I work with lots of different committees like the education committee and other committees. We talk about housing issues, education issues, and other important things.

I think it is important for people with disabilities to join groups so that they can learn about issues and talk about issues and help out to make things better for people with disabilities. I think other people with disabilities should join groups because this will help them learn new things and be active and change their lives and have a chance to help good things happen for them and to keep them away from depression or feeling bad about things.

Sam

Something that really bothers me is that I can't have a baby. I really want to be a mom, I want to have a baby and take care of that baby. I could take care of a baby but people like me don't get to have babies. Adoption people don't give babies to people with a disability. I don't understand that, I don't know why it has to be like that. It's not fair. It's not right. Just because I got a disability they think I can't take care of a baby. But I could do it.

I don't think there's anything wrong with anybody who has a disability. You're born like that, that's the way life is. God made you like that. You can't do anything about it. But we have all had experiences with people rejecting us because we have a disability. Some people who don't have disabilities don't want us around. They don't want us to talk to them. They think we might hurt them or hurt their children. I would never hurt a child. I like children and when I see them on the subway or on the street, I just smile at them 'cause they make me happy, you know, but then sometimes their parents get upset. They tell me not to talk to their children or they pull their children away from me. Sometimes they give me bad looks. What do they think I'm gonna do? I would never hurt kids!

Sometimes families reject their babies with disabilities. They give them up because they have a disability. I would never give up a baby if I had one, even if it had a disability. If our parents had done this we'd be terribly upset. They don't have a disability and that's what upsets me, that's what makes my cry sometimes, that's what really hurts and really bothers me because that's just the way it is. You don't know how hurtful that is, how really upsetting. I don't know why people treat me like this. I wonder if people really respect me or not? I am really hurt by it, but what am I going to do?

Donna

My Work at “Lemon and Allspice”

I work at Lemon and Allspice Cookery. I’ve been working there for four years. I wear many hats at the cookery. I’m a partner, pre-moter, order taker, teacher, a delivery person and signatory. This means that I sign people’s cheques. Or I sign cheques to our supplies.

Lemon and Allspice is a catering company run by people with intellectual disabilities. The partners go to meetings. At these meetings we ake decisions about issues. These issues are brought to our meeting by other partners, job coaches, etc.

My hours vary from time to time.l right now it’s slow because it summer. In October it’ll get busier. October to December is our busiest time. It’s busy at this time because of Halloween and Christmas.

I learned a lot of things from working there. I learned how to bake new things and how make wraps.

The benefits are that working supplements my income. Also I like proving that we can work even though we have disabilities.

Joanna

My Experience with Project Work

Working with people, working around people, was the best part of my experience at Project Work. I enjoyed that. And having a job coach – she was very supportive all the way through. I was in the program for 5 months.

I learned very fast, very quick. My job coach said that.

The difficult part was learning how to work well with people and do a good job, even when other things were bothering me.

I got work experience out of the program. So now, when I go to a job, I’ll know what to do. My job coach helped me to write a resume. When it was all done, Project Work mailed me a certificate.

I had to go to life skills, to learn how to talk around people, how to talk to people in public, how to talk about hiring and firing…We watched a video about how to talk to people; I learned a lot from that, too.

It helps me to find a job. It means a lot to me. Its very important, because I want more money. ODSP is not enough. I just want a job so I can do something because I’m getting bored.

I like being around people. People can help me out if I’m stuck or something like that. I get kind of nervous or shy at first. I may not understand what they’re talking about. My job coach, she was walking around to see how I’m doing. She walked around the store and would say “Hi Donna. How are you feeling?” And sometimes she would help me with something. It made me feel good, feel happy.

Now that I’ve been in the program, I can do it on my own.

I was on time for the job, the training. I was never late. I was there when she asked me to be there. My job was for 2 days a week at first, and then after that for 1 day a week. My job coach was with me throughout.

I finished April the second. It was on a Thursday.

Donna